Race

The story of Jesse Owens and his fight to get to and compete in the German-hosted 1936 Olympics. Unfortunately, I don’t think this film did the true story any sort of justice. Even with stellar performances from Stephan James and Jason Sudeikis.

Rating: 3.0

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• Director: Stephen Hopkins
• MPAA: PG-13
• Runtime: 2h 14m
• Year: 2016

Alternative(s)

• Reason: An athlete competes in the Olympics during the onset of WW1.
• Suggestion: Jump forward to WW2 and you’ll struggle to stay Unbroken after watching Louis Zamperini’s post-Olympics journey.

The Fall Guy

A movie about a movie being made without its star so the stunt man has to get into shenanigans on and off set to find out what’s really happening. Oh, and the director is his ex.

Look. I get it. We all, as a species, love nothing more than to watch Ryan Gosling do/say literally anything. But this took a hell of a long time to get to the 3rd act where the best bits happened.

Rating: 3.0

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• Director: David Leitch
• MPAA: PG-13
• Runtime: 2h 6m
• Year: 2024

Alternative(s)

• Reason: You’d watch The Fall Guy for Ryan, right?
• Suggestion: You’d watch Barbie for Ken.

The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare

In what should’ve been a miniseries, a merry band of misfits help score some major points against the Germans in WW2. There’s a teammate who needs rescuing, some info that needs stealing, and a boat that needs…something. But there are too many people doing too many things for us to feel anything other than ‘haha, that was cool’.

Rating: 3.0

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• Director: Guy Ritchie
• MPAA: R
• Runtime: 2h 0m
• Year: 2024

The Mermaid and Mrs. Hancock

A man, a prostitute, and their peers discover what chosen happiness looks like. This was way more depressing than the jacket blurb would have you believe.

I think Imogen read “we accept the love we think we deserve” from another overtly depressing book (The Perks of Being a Wallflower) and decided to make an entire book that’s just that same sentiment over and over and over again.

Rating: 3.0

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• Author: Imogen Hermes Gowar
• Format: Audiobook
• Length: 17h 19m
• Published: 2018

[Rewatch]: Red Eye

Nowadays you have to worry about losing a window or two mid-flight. But it could be worse. You could have a crazy stalk you and insist you play a role in an assassination.

Holds up better than most mid-2000’s films.

Rating: 3.0

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• Director: Wes Craven
• MPAA: PG-13
• Runtime: 1h 25m
• Year: 2005

Monkey Man

When will the bad guys learn? You don’t mess with someone’s dog, car, or mom. Plain-n-simple. Because if/when you do, you welcome the relentless ass-whooping that will ensue and will have deserved every throat punch and bitch slap you get.

Dev Patel’s maiden voyage in the director’s chair was a decent one. I think this movie was waaaaay too long and could’ve been tightened up. You could also tell that they kept the original Netflix ending of cutting off midsentence. But I was entertained with the fight sequences. Plus, anyone who relies on an army of kick-ass LGBTQ+ members is okay in my book.

Rating: 3.0

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• Director: Dev Patel
• MPAA: R
• Runtime: 2h 1m
• Year: 2024

Late Night with the Devil

David Dastmalchian delivers a stand-out performance as a struggling late night host trying to keep his show alive. The film is a a modern take on campy horror and exquisitely represents 1970’s late night shows, focusing on an infamous Halloween taping. Too bad the ending ruined all hope this had for being truly monumental.

Rating: 3.0

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• Director: Cameron Cairnes, Colin Cairnes
• MPAA: R
• Runtime: 1h 33m
• Year: 2023

Civil War

Do you need to feel more hollow/gross/futile than you already do? Great news! Civil War can lure you into a Ford Expedition labeled “Press” and take you on a disheartening adventure of one version of America’s future. Spoiler Alert: Everyone sucks.

I’m way too critical to have fully immersed in the whole experience, but I think the message was very clear. Even if the plot wasn’t. Or the backstory. Or the rules of the internet. However, I am 0% critical of Kirsten Dunst. Amazing. No notes.

Rating: 3.5

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• Director: Alex Garland
• MPAA: R
• Runtime: 1h 49m
• Year: 2024

Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire

Unlike what the movie blurbs said, this movie is actually about Kong accidentally picking a fight with another Titan and then asking Godzilla for help at the last possible second (with the help of yet another Titan). I mean Godzilla does make a few appearances here and there. But he’s mostly napping…I mean recharging. Ya.

It’s still a fun movie that was taking nothing seriously. And that’s why it worked at all. In spite of having one of the worst movie scores to ever exist.

Rating: 3.0

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• Director: Adam Wingard
• MPAA: PG-13
• Runtime: 1h 55m
• Year: 2024

Immaculate

Detroit-native, Cecilia, travels to Italy to serve as a nun in a hospital-ish convent assisting elderly nuns who are… on their way out. But she quickly learns that’s not the most macabre thing happening at this very secluded convent.

As disturbing as every single scene was, I think the most unsettling was hearing some Sister Act hits slowed down and sung by creepy nuns.

Rating: 3.5

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• Director: Michael Mohan
• MPAA: R
• Runtime: 1h 29m
• Year: 2024